Sunday, August 12, 2012

What's making me happy this week, XXXII

This week has been all about stuff for the wedding. We are buying stuff for the wedding, organizing stuff for the wedding, talking about how to transport stuff to the wedding. I was getting a little anxious about the whole thing. Do I have the correct amount of stuff? Should there be more? Less? Should it just be different stuff altogether? And then by chance, I came across two articles about all the stuff in our lives, and I started feeling a little better about my stuff. I could go on and on, but because people on the Internet loooooove to pontificate about how we all have too much stuff, I'll try to be brief.

The first article was about how you don't need endless amounts of things to be happy in your relationship, but finding the things (or, conversely, getting rid of the things) that make your relationship better or less contentious can make a world of difference. For example, if you're constantly fighting over the dishes not being done, will buying a dishwasher improve your relationship? Will getting rid of a pair of season tickets give you more time to communicate, or are those games quality time you spend together? I think this advice goes farther than just relationships: would I be more present if I didn't have a smart phone? (Possibly.) Would I work out more without a t.v.? (haha NO.)

The second article was about "having it all," which I found insightful because I've been thinking about what comes next now that I'm getting married. I was browsing blogs when I came across this excerpt at Mighty Girl: "...I think to myself that the solution to many problems is deceptively obvious. We are chasing the wrong things, asking ourselves the wrong questions. It is not, 'Can we have it all?' -- with 'all' being some kind of undefined marker that shall forever be moved upwards out of reach just a little bit with each new blessing. We should ask instead, 'Do we have enough?'"

Then I read the whole article, and I'm certainly not where the author and her friends are. I don't have children to worry about or a house to rent. But I do have anxieties coming from the same place: the desire to be stress-free, to do things perfectly the first time, to have all the best things. This week, these articles have been a good reminder that while I may not have it all, and it may not be perfect, I do have enough. And if that's good enough for my entire life, I bet it's good enough for my wedding.

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