I have gone shopping 3 times in the last 5 days. Why? Could it be because I have given up on the idea of moving out of my parents' house in the near future? Yes, I think that's exactly it. I even named my aforementioned shopping trip: the "Spending All The Money I've Saved For Rent On Shoes And DVD's Because I Don't Need It Til At Least 2008" shopping spree. I liked the ring of it, the way it just rolled right off my tongue. And when I was buying things, I wasn't thinking about the Snow White wallpaper* I wake up to every morning. Or how I get ready in the same bathroom as I did in 7th grade.
I feel sort of guilty, living off my parents, but I think they (and my little sister) like having me around so that makes me feel a little bit better about it. I hadn't thought much about it until my brother and foster sister moved back to school a few weeks ago. We were getting ready to eat dinner last week and she turned to me and said, "isn't it nice with just the four of us?" It makes me wonder what kinds of things they said about me when I finally left at the end of every summer, but apparently I am a positive addition now that I am grown up.
Or maybe? They just like having me close by so that when they say, "welcome to the real world!" the close proximity helps maximize the pleasure they get out of seeing my reaction. I think this could be it.
*this was never my choice of wallpaper. It was my sister's, and I inherited it when she took over the bigger bedroom that was mine.
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